Our Nation's Political Past, brought to you by Robot Chicken

Continue Reading...

Lady, play your mandolin!

Hey I'm Izzy, and I'm joining this blog. I'm mostly going to be reviewing films, but this clip was just too good to resist. Adult swim has nothing on it--watch, laugh...cry?

Continue Reading...

Some of the Best Reporting I've Ever Seen

Enjoy.

Continue Reading...

Funny Winston Churchill Quotes

Here are some decently funny Winston Churchill quotes for a little light reading. I promise I will write a huge post on health care, however.

When I am abroad I always make it a rule never to criticise or attack the Government of my country. I make up for lost time when I am at home.

"A sheep in sheep's clothing"
On Clement Attlee

A modest man, who has much to be modest about
On Clement Attlee

"An empty taxi arrived at 10 Downing Street, and when the door was opened, Atlee got out"
On Clement Attlee

"I wish Stanley Baldwin no ill, but it would have been much better if he had never lived"
On Stanley Baldwin

"He occasionally stumbled over the truth, but hastily picked himself up and hurried on as if nothing had happened"
On Stanley Baldwin

"He looked at foreign affairs through the wrong end of a municipal drainpipe"
On Neville Chamberlain

Lady Astor to Churchill: "Winston, if you were my husband I would flavour your coffee with poison"
Churchill: "Madam, if I were your husband, I should drink it"

Bessie Braddock to Churchill: "Winston, your drunk!"
Churchill: "Bessie, you're ugly, and tomorrow morning I shall be sober"

"What could you hope to achieve except to be sunk in a bigger and more expensive ship this time"
On Admiral Mountbatten

Have a splendid day!

Continue Reading...

Crash for Clunkers

Many of you have probably heard of Cash for Clunkers, the federal program where the government will give you a $4500 rebate towards a new fuel efficient vehicle when you get rid of your clunker. The program has been a wild success and has been a valuable part of the stimulus package. However, have you heard of Crash for Clunkers?



Pretty freaking sweet.

Continue Reading...

This Cracks Me Up

Please watch this.



Have a great day.

Continue Reading...

Robot Chicken - Star Wars

Robot Chicken, which is on Adult Swim, is a pretty funny show, especially its two Star Wars episodes. Here are some clips. The first one has something to do with politics at least.

This next one cracks me up.

This one is thrown in for good measure.

You can watch all of Robot Chicken Star Wars Episode I on AdultSwim.com. The second episode is really funny too, but I haven't found it online...yet.

Continue Reading...

A Lesson In Political Science: Cows (WARNING: this is funny)

(I stole this a really really long time ago from some other site)

Humor break...
Political Viewpoint : COWS
Lesson In Political Science

DEMOCRATIC

You have two cows.
Your neighbor has none.
You feel guilty for being successful.
Barbara Streisand sings for you.

REPUBLICAN

You have two cows.
Your neighbor has none.
So?

SOCIALIST

You have two cows.
The government takes one and gives it to your neighbor.
You form a cooperative to tell him how to manage his cow.

COMMUNIST

You have two cows.
The government seizes both and provides you with milk.
You wait in line for hours to get it.
It is expensive and sour.

CAPITALISM, AMERICAN STYLE

You have two cows.
You sell one, buy a bull, and build a herd of cows.

BUREAUCRACY, AMERICAN STYLE

You have two cows.
Under the new farm program the government pays you to shoot one, milk the other, and then pours the milk down the drain.

AMERICAN CORPORATION

You have two cows.
You sell one, lease it back to yourself and do an IPO on the 2nd one.
You force the two cows to produce the milk of four cows. You are surprised when one cow drops dead. You spin an announcement to the analysts stating you have downsized and are reducing expenses.
Your stock goes up.

FRENCH CORPORATION

You have two cows.
You go on strike because you want three cows.
You go to lunch and drink wine.
Life is good.

JAPANESE CORPORATION

You have two cows.
You redesign them so they are one-tenth the size of an ordinary cow and produce twenty times the milk.
They learn to travel on unbelievably crowded trains.
Most are at the top of their class at cow school.

GERMAN CORPORATION

You have two cows.
You engineer them so they are all blond, drink lots of beer, give excellent quality milk, and run a hundred miles an hour.
Unfortunately they also demand 13 weeks of vacation per year.

ITALIAN CORPORATION

You have two cows but you don't know where they are.
While ambling around, you see a beautiful woman.
You break for lunch.
Life is good.

RUSSIAN CORPORATION

You have two cows.
You have some vodka.
You count them and learn you have five cows.
You have some more vodka.
You count them again and learn you have 42 cows.
The Mafia shows up and takes over however many cows you really have.

TALIBAN CORPORATION

You have all the cows in Afghanistan, which are two.
You don't milk them because you cannot touch any creature's private parts.
You get a $40 million grant from the US government to find alternatives to milk production but use the money to buy weapons.

IRAQI CORPORATION

You have two cows.
They go into hiding.
They send radio tapes of their mooing.

POLISH CORPORATION

You have two bulls.
Employees are regularly maimed and killed attempting to milk them.

BELGIAN CORPORATION

You have one cow.
The cow is schizophrenic.
Sometimes the cow thinks he's French, other times he's Flemish.
The Flemish cow won't share with the French cow.
The French cow wants control of the Flemish cow's milk.
The cow asks permission to be cut in half.
The cow dies happy.

FLORIDA CORPORATION

You have a black cow and a brown cow.
Everyone votes for the best looking one.
Some of the people who actually like the brown one best accidentally vote for the black one.
Some people vote for both.
Some people vote for neither.
Some people can't figure out how to vote at all.
Finally, a bunch of guys from out-of-state tell you which one you think is the best-looking cow.

CALIFORNIA CORPORATION

You have millions of cows.
They make real California cheese.
Only five speak English.
Most are illegals.
Arnold likes the ones with the big udders.

Have a good day!

Continue Reading...

Book Review: The O'Reilly Factor For Kids

Okay, I haven't actually read this book, but I'll share a review of it with you.

The O'Reilly Factor For Kids is a scattershot guide to all the things O'Reilly thinks kids should do: toughen up, buck "the self-esteem police," ignore stereotypes, stop listening to rap music, and allow Chuck Knoblauch (!) to serve as an inspirational example.

O'Reilly also:

* Calls teenagers "kids," which is exactly the way to reach them.
* Recalls the one time he ever bullied someone. (O'Reilly was in Little League.)
* Warns, "Girls, some guys will tell you anything to get the sex thing going."
* Boasts he has never been "drunk or stoned."
* Complains of "attacks" against him by "religious maniacs."
* Demonstrates a sparkling comic gift: "Every teacher you have is kind, smart, hardworking, and trustworthy. Sure, and I'm Brad Pitt."
* Says "I didn't have sex until I was twenty years old! Can you believe it? I was kind of a shy guy around girls, and I had absolutely no 'moves.'"

O'Reilley would pick Chuck Knoblauch, one of my least favorite baseball players of all time. The book apparently gets even better. He defines pinheads and smart operators.

"A Pinhead is a kid who shoplifts."
"A Smart Operator remembers the birthdays of friends and family members."

"A Smart Operator is a kid who looks past her neighborhood, town, state and country to see the world outside."
"A Pinhead is a kid who finds a way to use the word 'butt' in every other sentence, especially when shouting in the halls at school."

New game, who can use the word "butt" in every other sentence? Seems like an adequate challenge for a college student.

I ask the question, is O'Reilly really the best person to be instructing our kids how to behave? Let us all watch him flip out in this next video. WARNING: Adult language is used, and by the looks of it O'Reilly is very much an adult.



Haha, here is a dance remix of the previous video. Also swearing in this one.



Have a great day.

Continue Reading...